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An Ode To Android / "Oh Grow Up Apple"

Eric McBride


I don't know about you guys, but the reaction from Apple fans and now Apple employees in regards to Android getting Instagram is just getting plain outright STUPID. I mean come's one thing if a few crazy fans wanna get upset...But for the VP of Apple to come out and publically say that because of Android he's stopped using the app? WTF? It's almost like he's trying to make Android users look poor or stupid, and I for one have seriously had enough of it. Due to the incredibly stupid antics that this apps release on Android have stirred up, it has inspired me to write a poem. That's right...a poem. This poem is not only an ode to Android, but a message for Apple users (AND employees) to simply GROW UP. It's Friday, I haven't ranted in a while, and now I have an excuse :-D

Oh Andy dear little green droid
It's amazing to see...the success you've enjoyed
You started so small... and grew up so damn fast
It's so awesome to you whooped Apple's ass

Both in sales and in style...yeah you show em who's king
And give us so much more...than that silly iThing
You've got apps of all help out everyday
All conviently your new Google Play

See what's cool about he doesn't talk crap
Like those guys who parade...with their Apple iMacs
Doesn't cry or get the fully grown man
Who got so freakin pissed...when you got Instagram

See it's people like him...who give you a bad name
As they just can't accept...that you've gotten such fame
So they whine and say "hey!...gather arms lets attack!“
"Instagram was for us!...only Apple has that!“

You're response is just "chill...guys it's only an app“
"Your life must be pathetic...can't you realize that?“
"Is it such a big deal...just to snap a few pics“
"Then upload it to Facebook? you guys are such **cks

So go home and bow you're iPhone statue
And just pray to the Gods...that it doesn't slap you
Cause the iPhone itself...we have no problem with
It's the people who use them...when they act like such pricks

Andy took out the iPhone...that's a fact you can read
And what's next is a warning...that I think you should heed
Yes he's proven the best of the best
So don't get mad and whine...cause the iPad is next...

Seriously Apple.....grow up. I can be just as immature as your Vice President (yes I linked twice to that article, as it's just so pathetic).

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  • Eric McBride Apr 22, 2012 Link

    I had no idea this would get such a great response! Thanks everyone! Really glad you all took the time to read my silly poem :-D

  • Nonya Business Apr 22, 2012 Link

    _i loved the part when u said andy i love how u whooped apples ass

  • Eric McBride Apr 21, 2012 Link

    True that! More hype for the next Android flagship!

    Glad you liked it! :-D

  • Sean Foster Apr 21, 2012 Link

    After a 12 hour shift, I needed that Eric.

    Gave me a real laugh. The whole farce is near tragic, it's a rich source of material for the next Galaxy ad.

  • Matthew Bell Apr 21, 2012 Link

    Eric...this is legendry! :-). If it wasn't for the fact that my g/f would blow a gasket if I did I would plaster this over my FB and Twitter! Lol. Good work! But you might want to patient it before apple does and then tries to sue you for its use! ;-).

    Looking forward to your next masterpiece!

    (ironically sent from my 3rd gen iPad, which I want to point out I won and am using as a (poor excuse of a) comprimise until the asus infinity is released....)

  • Eric McBride Apr 21, 2012 Link

    LOL! They ll probably try to patent fruit next!

    They are seriously crazy!

  • bits Apr 21, 2012 Link

    En do they also own the patent for the REAL "Apples " in our supermarkts?... Grow up folks !!

  • Eric McBride Apr 21, 2012 Link

    I really appreciate all the feedback guys! At first I really debated posting it, as I thought it was simply too silly. So glad you enjoyed it! :-D

  • chinu Apr 21, 2012 Link

    nice poem eric

  • Käpt'n Andreas V. Apr 21, 2012 Link

    Eric, my deepest respect for that poem!

    Maybe I try to convert it for our german speeking users :-P

  • Christopher Silva
    • Admin
    Apr 21, 2012 Link

    Good one Eric.

  • WhoDunit Apr 21, 2012 Link

    Great poem! I totally agree. Here's something I posted on Instagram...

  • Valter DeSousa Apr 21, 2012 Link

    Fantastic, well done and thanks for pointing the futility of the iPeople...

  • elzie jackson Apr 21, 2012 Link

    O thanks for that ot was awsomely said sir

  • User picture
    Nick N. Apr 21, 2012 Link

    LOL, good stuff!

    This was the best line:

    "So don't get mad and whine...cause the iPad is next..."

    Oh, yes, bring it on, Andy, bring it on...

  • Asher Apr 20, 2012 Link

    awsome poem i completely agree with you about how apple is getting upset about instagram.

  • Eric McBride Apr 20, 2012 Link

    Thanks for the feedback guys! Really glad you enjoyed it!

  • Christiana B. Apr 20, 2012 Link

    yeah good One! loved it... rotfl :-):-):-)

  • Roan Apr 20, 2012 Link

    Hahaha hilarious!! great poem!

  • Eric McBride Apr 20, 2012 Link

    Thank you for reading!

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